Why I can't forget MG? Gerry sobbing secretly again! Hainzz

God, no matter how hard I tried, why can't I just forget MG? I don't want to be a bad gal. I know I am not perfect and I know it is WRONG and IMPOSSIBLE...But WHY am I still struggling with this emotional thingy these few days ?! I thought I have already put this behind but why do I suddenly remember MG and miss him so badly again?! Is every effort made in forgetting him to be in vain???? It is already 5 months now and I still miss him so much! Its a feeling which I myself dont even understand! I thought I had already submitted it to You on the alter.....sob sob sob...............

Is this statement from Wildcat true? "The best ones are those whom you cannot get.... And the good ones are taken......" But I know I dont want to be affected by such a worldly statement. I just trust that God is preparing someone for me......

Thank God, I suddenly remember the vision while sobbing.....the mountains, streams and sun. I achieved nothing at my age now, no family, no career, nothing! Everything seems to be start from scatch again for me. But I know it is a brand new GOOD Start! .........Just like Christ died for us and it starts to change the life of everyone whom believes in him!

Lord, I will continue to trust in your leading and stop wavering. I will trust u like the children of Israel and I know I will reach my promised land! I will meditate on Ps 23!
Pls strengthen me ...I dont want to be a 'flat' christian. I bind the spirit of distraction.....always toying with my emotions. Out Out Out! I will not bow down to it. I will be a strong woman, full of faith and totally dependent on God!

Thank you Jesus! Be Strong Gerry! Ganbatte ne!