Turning Point of my Life

Today is Sunday! Its sabbath day! Finally can go church. Told God woke me up early today. Dress up & get ready waiting for KP to come. BUT when i open the door, MY GOSH!!!! His face is full of hatred and anger! Seems like he is going to manifest any time.

He threw his temper and damaged my dustbin. God!!! Why he always has to damage our house and our things? I started breaking down and mess up my whole make up. Anger then engulfed me and I was tempted to be wonder woman again! But Godly fear seize me again. Just then i realise I still want to continue my life journey. Tempted again not to go church, but i know if i dun go, my life will be CRUSHED!

Its the first time in my life that I find that Praising God can be SSOOOOOO difficult. I barely sing and started mumbling it at the 2nd song Bec i rem Cindy Taught us that sacrifice of praise is very barely precious to God. So i started surrendering my praise & worship to God. Service was good, too bad i was overwhelm w hurts and disappointment.

My Lucky has turned away from a faithful little loving dog to a tyranny demonic doggie. Reasoning to him is useless. The most dramatic part of the day was my Dearest Lucky actually wanted me to go to netherland with him. He said the date 10 10 (10 Oct) was good. I was deeply saddened by it.

Really want to thank God my good tomodachi was all along with me and pray that God will continue to calm her down from the drama today.

I brokedown realising that I can no longer hang onto what God has promised me. I messed it all up just bec i did not stay focus and guard my emotions. I am tired of hanging on. Words cant express my deepest sorrow at this moment. I just prayed that Father can help me now to overcome & continue with my life!

Urgent Prayer to Father:
Father father! I come before you with all my sadness, broken heartedness, tiredness, despair, discouragement, emotional hurts, depression etc.....please Father take away all my dismay & hurts. Help me to become stronger and continue with my life. I want to grow up and understand and assume all the "punishment" that i am facing now for my disobedience to you years ago. Please Father, fill me up with your Holy Sprirt daily and protect me from all evil & demonic plans. Teach me how to control my emotions and focus unto the Lord. Forgive me for all the curses that came out from my mouth. Father I repent now before you and plead for Jesus blood to wash me clean again.

Father I am blessed that i still have you! God I plead for Lucky that you will protect him and soften his dead and hardened heart. Lord, it is YOU that can turn the situation around. Lord, although I am giving up but somehow deep down i still feel HOPE.

God I need to be focus now. I will temporary give up the plan of reaching out to this U5 at this moment. Lord, I pray u will watch over him and bless him. I plead for Jesus Blood to cover him and cancel every demonic plan on him. Lord, protect him and bless him.....

Father, please give me a focus mind to praise and serve you from today onwards. Help me to overcome this darkest period of my life. I thank you that u have set before me a group of wonderfuls friends to stand in the gap for me now. I am thankful for it, & I believe I WILL make it through! IT IS MY BREAKTHROUGH!!! I CLAIM IT IN JESUS NAME!!! Father I thank you for protecting me and sammi today. Father I thank you for Cindy. Most importantly, Father, i thank you for bringing me back to Church. Without all these wonderful family members, I think i would be in hades now. Thank you for bringing so many wonderful bros and sis like Ghiam, Cin, Der, Joy, Cong, Aaron, Alvin & even David for fulfilling their roles today.

God help me to start afresh by today at this very moment!

Thank you Jesus......Thank u Father..... In jesus name i pray.....AMEN!!!!